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If you are willing to suspend your belief and let go of preconceived ideas of reality, I would like to invite you to enjoy the dream-scape I call the Liminal Space. At first it will seem a distant memory or maybe a dream. A distant part of you has been tucked away and hidden. Hi and welcome - I hope that you find your landing here is a mystery to you and in reading these words you feel called to by a voice that has been echoing your name. There will be something solid for you to stand upon or you will be taught to fly.A Place of Peace Welcome to the Liminal Space - the void awaits your mastery. When you walk to the edge of all the light you have and take that first step into the darkness of the unknown, you must believe that one of two things will happen. Literally seeing the glass as slightly more than half full, helps us cross the liminal space between What Was and Whats Next.It actually modulates the way the primary cortex processes raw information (Hutson, 2012, p.110). Physically and psychologically the hope associated with optimism influences how we perceive the world.According to science writer, Matt Hutson, optimism allows us to see openings for success in ambiguous situations and redefine obstacles as opportunities.Psychologically carrying people in your heart and mind, who believe in you, motivated you or would be proud of your courage, means you are not traveling alone.You will be surprised to learn how many others have taken this journey, know the terrain and want to help. Connecting with others along the way for feedback and support is vital. Curiosity allows embracing the unexpected – the person, option, network, or kindness of a stranger, that unexpectedly comes your way, becoming part of the next chapter you never considered.Curiosity changes the mountain from the one that hides a frightening unknown to the mountain you cant wait to explore.Freedom to change your mind relieves the fear of not getting it right and allows for using lessons learned.You want to know where you would never want to live– as a step to where you would love to live.Worry less about mistakes or wrong turns and more about what you can learn from them.Accessing our stress regulators like exercise, cooking, praying, gardening, golfing, making music, listening to music, playing cards, reading mysteries on a daily, if not regular, basis gives us something we know, something we can predict and something that buffers stress physically and psychologically.Often when highly anxious, our Fight/Flight response for survival obscures our focus on what we love to do and what we do that lowers stress. Buffer your steps with ongoing stress reduction.Small steps and achievable goals fill the unknown space with life experiences, places, people and a stronger you.Any goal that we achieve fuels momentum and lowers anxiety.Rewriting your resume, reconsidering a change by taking a course, renting a new place to live, inviting friends to brainstorm, trying online dating, volunteering to be an unpaid intern in the field you love, taking a part time job in something completely different are invaluable steps.Life is a journey, not a destination.(Ralph Waldo Emerson) They miss the step of finding a less frightened, stronger self, able to match with a new and different partner.Particularly when going forward after the loss of a partner by divorce or break-up, there is often so much fear of facing the unknown alone that there is a tendency to leap over the unknown to the first familiar type partner they meet.Leaping over the Liminal Space to the Familiar Sadly this lowers self-esteem and keeps them more anxious.įew people regret holding that job they hate if they aresearching for a job they could love.They are unhappy but hang on to the edge of an unhappy place because they assume the worst about the future and the worst about their capacity to venture into the unknown. Some try to reduce their anxiety about the unknown by not moving at all.You cant see where you are going, if you are looking backwards. Of course we need to grieve in our own way for what we have suffered, lost or expected but looking forward, even with tears, enables the possibilities of a new chapter.Research suggests that the inability to stop ruminating about what was or what should have been keeps us unhappy and limits our view of future options.